Divorce can throw a wrench into the family routines you’ve worked so hard to build. Yet, routines can be adjusted, and if you and the children will be far better off if you end the marriage, this temporary transition period may be well worth the end result.
The chances of divorce ultimately proving to be beneficial or harmful for your children will depend partly on how you handle your divorce process. Here are some things you can do to improve your chances of a successful long-term outcome.
Remember your children’s best interests
It is easy to get sidetracked and dragged into battles with your spouse, often over things that won’t seem worth the time in retrospect. Remembering to do what is best for the children, even if it might not be what you want to do in the moment, is crucial. Here are a few examples:
- Letting your spouse keep the house if the kids will primarily live with them. This can help provide stability for your children.
- Paying the full amount of child support that you can, rather than trying to fudge the figures, so that you pay less.
If you need to wear a special bracelet or adhere temporary tattoos to your hands so that you’re reminded to think of your kids and not your own anger for a while, don’t be afraid to do what it takes to keep your overarching goal clear and present at all times.
Take time out for yourself
Holding down a job while looking after the kids and handling a divorce may be too much to manage from time to time. Take advantage of help when it is offered. That means saying yes if your spouse wants to take the kids away for the weekend, for example. You can use the downtime to get some rest so you can bring a clear head to your divorce negotiations and to taking care of your kids when they are with you.
Another important step you can take is to get legal help early on. Having someone who can explain the divorce process and who can help you to navigate it successfully can reduce your stress and time spent dealing with legal challenges. This will allow you to spend more time caring for your children during this challenging period.